Kris Kringle’s Jingles

The secret Christmas songs that really “sleigh”.

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Tired of torturing yourself with that scratchy old CD of prehistoric Christmas music that your great-grandparents listened to? Is Mariah Carey haunting your dreams, saying that the only thing she wants for Christmas is you? Feeling uncontrollably emotional every time you hear Rudolph being bullied? Don’t worry-I’ve done the favor for you and found some of the quintessential, yet largely unknown, holiday bangerz that are sure to light up your Christmas playlist. And for you Jewish kids, be sure to check out the Dreidel Dreidel Trap Remix on Youtube.

When Christmas Comes-Mariah Carey and John Legend
You may think that the sole zenith of Mariah Carey’s Christmas career is “All I Want for Christmas is You”, but you would be wrong: as the undisputed Queen of Christmas, Carey has plenty of equally amazing holiday tunes to jam out to. This one is particularly special with the addition of John Legend’s soothing voice. When mixed with Carey’s enormous range, it’s enough to make any naughty person turn nice.

Oh Santa!-Mariah Carey
Yes, this is another Mariah Carey song. But if the duet with Legend is a calming peppermint tea, this song is more of a triple-shot eggnog latte to get you straight out of bed Christmas morning. “Oh Santa!” is a call for Carey’s lost lover, whom she wants to get back by taking advantage of Santa’s gift-giving. She even says that she believes in St. Nick, which obviously means we all should too.

Underneath the Tree-Kelly Clarkson
In her first Christmas album, Wrapped in Red, Kelly Clarkson
produces several top-notch tunes, however “Underneath the
Tree” is a true holiday anthem. The song is remarkably similar to
“All I Want for Christmas is You” in it’s ability to make you want to jump up and down like an elf on steroids.

Winter Wonderland/Here Comes Santa Claus-Anna Kendrick and Snoop Dogg
This song is most famous for it’s appearance in Pitch Perfect 2, where Kendrick helps Snoop out with his newest Christmas single by adding a fresh beat. But the most mind-blowing part about this remix is that it’s basically a package deal: the tune takes two modern, catchy versions of Christmas classics and seamlessly blend them together like the red and white stripes of a candy cane.

River-Cee Lo Green
For anyone who’s acquainted with “River”, you’re probably wondering if Cee Lo could possibly have created an adaptation of the heart-wrenching ballad that deserves to be in this prestigious article. To answer your intrigue, the singer-rapper performs the song so successfully that it rivals the soulful effect of Joni Mitchell’s 1971 original. His voice effortlessly slides right down your chimney and into your heart. Be sure to grab a box of kleenex and a chocolate-filled advent calendar in order   to combat a serious case of the feels.

Anything Trap
If you’re only going to listen to one thing one thing on this list, look up “Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy Trap Remix” or “Carol of the Bells Crystalize Trap Remix” on Youtube. If you do this, I guarantee you that this holiday season will be the best one yet (even though you may feel like Grandma laced your hot cocoa and made you trip hardcore)

 

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