Short King Advice

For short kings, by a short king.

Q- Do you sit in a booster seat?-
A- Most of the time, but on occasion I like to live a LITTLE wild and not sit on one. I can see enough, but don’t tell anyone!

Q- Do you use pedal extensions?-
A- Driving was one of the biggest challenges for me, seeing all of my tall friends effortlessly reach the pedals and wheel was a bit disheartening. But after I bought pedal extensions, not only was my driving ability boosted, but my confidence was as well.

Q- What size shoes do you wear?-
A- As a Short King™ it’s hard to find shoes that fit my little dogs, so what I do is I take the shoes off of American Girl dolls and wear those instead. My favorites are the Josefina Montoya moccasins and the Caroline Abbott boots, take care!

Q- How do you feel like height shapes the amount of toxic masculinity you are allowed to express in our society? –
A- When you are short in life, everything you do may seem like less to the next person. I can assure you, short people CAN do big things. Being short should not hinder your ability to do important things.

Q- Are you ever afraid that you will get picked up by a bird one day?-
A- Birds are not real, but if they were, it would for sure be on my irrational fear list.

Q- What are the requirements to be a short king?-
A- There are no requirements to be a short king, it’s all about the mind set, there’s always a bigger fish in the sea.

Q- Do you drink out of shot glasses?-
A- I love having a tall refreshing glass of water out of a huge shot glass, they’re so easy to fit my little fingies around.

Q- Does size matter?-
A- I am a firm believer in quality over quantity. So when it comes to size, a short king is better than a tall prince.

Q- Do I count as a short king? I am 5’7?-
A- If you have the mindset of a short king then you are one even if you’re the average height.

Q- Can you ride roller coasters?-
A- Short Kings are powerful in numbers, don’t let a minimum height stop you from having fun. So when you come across this obstacle, find another short friend and get on their shoulders, two is better than one, toodles.

Q- What do you hold onto when the wind blows?-
A- As a short king it’s always good to be prepared for anything. This is why it’s always a good idea to keep ankle weights on you at all times. We need more short kings, not less.

Q- Best gift to buy for my short friends?-
A- Short kings are very minimalist so the best gift to give them is unconditional love… or Growth Hormones.

Q- What do you do when you have a crush on someone that is two feet taller than you?-
A- Use your confidence. There’s nothing wrong with having a partner that’s taller than you. All you need to do is shoot your shot even if it’s on a 7’ hoop.

Q- Do you wish you were taller?-
A- Being short is great. People always think it’s a disadvantage but then they get struck by lighting and then us short kings come out unscathed.
– G.C.